শুক্রবার, ২৫ মে, ২০১২

Resonance (feedback and help desired.)

I've been trying to write a decent Prologue for the book i'm writing, and after lots of times trying and hours put into it, i think i finally did a good job. T Did this catch your interest? If it was a book, would you want to read more? any critisicms/ advice desired. Please and thank you!"

the Book will be called 'Resonance'
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Prologue: Marisa

She never asked for this life. She had been pushed into it by fate, and it wasn't exactly a gentle push. It's not like she had ever said 'When I grow up, I want to be a Resonator, just like my daddy!' Well, it beat being a nurse, she supposed. A job taking care a sick people, or a job of hunting strange creatures?

Marisa was thinking this as she walked the city, her long black hair flowing in the wind slightly. Around her, rock music blared through her earphones, and those nearby were astonished at the face that she hadn't lost her sense of hearing. She kept her eyes closed as she walked in, the blazing sun disagreeing with her. She sidestepped a person who almost ran towards her, and kept moving.

She was wearing torn jeans at the knees, and a simple black tank top that trapped any hear, a pair of Oakleys in her hair. Black bracelets on her wrists completed the ensemble nicely.

Around her was the usual crowd. On one side of her, a kid was having a birthday party in a cafe. In front of her, an old lady was struggling to cross the street, tapping her can in annoyance as a car almost his her. She grumbled and moved on. On the other side, a group of teenagers standing around, obviously up to no good, but Marisa just moved on.

She continue walking, stopping as a car passed, then continued walking. There was a feeling in her chest, like her heart just skipped a beat. She afforded her self a small smile, increasing her pace. 'Just a little longer...'

Memories flooded to her, and she felt at home, glad to be in her hometown after two years of being away in 'College' Even now, the streets were familar to her, right down to the number of steps until the next block. She knew her favorite eating plac was two blocks to the right. She used to eat hamburgers with her brother there all the time.... she would have to call him up later.

She walked for two more blocks, when she finally got the signal she had been waiting for- her head was ringing, like someone had blown a whistle right in her ear. She stopped where she stood, in the middle of the street, a car skidding to avoid her, an a horn blared in anger, though she ignored it.

Slowly, she began to stretch her arm up, raising it into the air, and snapped, the sound of witch seemed to echo. Within her chest, her heart gave an incredible POUND. After that, it was as if everything suddendly decided to take a time out. The car that was rushing towards her froze on the ground. Behind her, the teenagers looked like a manniken, their raised feet no hitting the ground. Water, witch had been pouring into a glass, looked like it belonged in a painting. The music in Marisa's ears quieted down

Only two things seemed unfazed by this sudden occurance. The first was Marisa herself- she opened her ice blue eyes, looking at the area around her, focusing on the only other thing that moved.

Which happened to be the old lady from earlier. Seemingly oblivious to her surrondings, she just kept on walking, whistling a tune and tapping her cane. She took a few more steps, before she finally noticed that nothing else was moving. She stopped, and looked around her, before she and Marisa locked eyes.

They stood there, facing each other, as if it was an old western showdown. The old woman leaned back... and threw her cane at Marisa like an expert javelin thrower, turned around, and ran at speeds that would make track stars jealous.

Marisa gave a tsk of annoyance, ducking to avoid the cane, and sped off in hot pursuit, her spped almost equalling the old womans. Her hands moved to one of her bracelets, witch she tapped. It flashed for a second, changing shape intil it became a small dagger, witch she gripped.

The old woman was merciless. Like a football player running towards the touchdown zone, she angled her shoulder, bulldozing into the men standing still, throwing them into the streets, before taking an alley way, trying to dissappear out of Marisa's line of sight.

A sound buzzed in her ears. "She's planning on ambushing you. Its a skeleton, by the looks of it. She had a trash can lid.' Came the voice of a male in her ears, rough and inelegant

Marisa turned a corner, ducking low to avoid the lid, and sliced with her dagger. The old lady howled... and suddendly became un old lady like as the creatures illousion dissappeared. "A skelleton." Marisa said, pushing it away. "A corpse re animated by spirits wanting revenge. I'm glad I caught you before you could begin a serial killing streak."

The Skeleton, not quite done moving, palmed Marisa in her stomach, she took a few steps back, the air leaving her. With the sound of teeth chattering, it lunged forward to get in the strike destined to finish her.

It never met it's mark, as the sound of a gunshot was heard. The skeleton froze in place, thhen ooked at one of its bones, where a ball of light had lodged itself.

There was the sound of something hitting the ground, and a man landed, looking at the skeleton. He was dressed a lot like Marisa- torn pants, black top, a braclet on one hand, and a gun in the other. Short blonde hair and a mustashed graved his face. "Bullets made from compessed holy water and sunlight." He said with a smirk. "It doesn't matter what you do now, you're done for."

The Skeleton would have howled if it could, and raced towards the new arrival. Before his hand came upon him, the bones flashed with a light, vanishing into thin air.

Marisa took a few breaths, before standing upright. "Thanks for the help, Cole."

"that's what a partner is for. I'm guessing you forgot to attack the bone?" Cole replied

"Ya. Most things vanish instantly, so i just stabbed. Sorry about that." She apologized. She raised her hand, snapping. There was another heart beat, and the music in her headphones began to blare, aslife returned to the world..

"I doubt that was our target." Marisa said, resting her back against a wall. "Do you?"

Cole shook his head. "Too weak in nature. I gue'll we'll be here a while. But, finding accomadations shouldn't be a problem. This is your hometown, right?"

Marisa gave another slight smile. "Good, I can see him after two years." She said, pulling a black and purple cell phone, dialing numbers from meory, putting it to her ear. "...Hello? Joshua?"

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