Oh, folks. Does the New York Times ever have a surprise in store for you!
The newly launched blog ?Booming? aimed at the Baby Boomer generation. Because I guess having an entire newspaper devoted to the generation wasn?t enough. Editor Jill Abramson is a ?Boomer. Manager editors Dean Baquet and John M. Geddes are ?Boomers. Opinion editor Andrew Rosenthal is a ?Boomer. Sports editor Tom Jolly is a ?Boomer. Publisher Arthur Ochs Sulzberger, Jr. is a ?Boomer. I guess, when everyone running a newspaper (HA! Remember those!) is of the same generation ? the most selfish, self-aggrandizing, navel-gazing generation ? it only makes sense to launch a new endeavor dedicated to yourself and your peers.
So far, blog entries published via Booming include: ?Looking Toward Retirement?, ?Why Cant I Read This AARP Bulletin?, ?For Better, For Worse, Couples Who Endure?, and ?I?m Not Getting Any Better.? Hoo boy. Good news for me, I?m not going to have to search very long or very hard for annoying Baby Boomer articles to lambaste in the future.
Michael Winerip, the ?Boomer who appears to be running the Booming show, added a bit of an introduction to the website along with links to his Facebook page (look at him, so old and yet so tech-savvy!) and an e-mail link. He writes, ?Booming is a new online destination about baby boomers ? the 78 million Americans born between 1946 and 1964. Besides news and information useful to this generation?? What news and information will be useful to this generation? Please tell me that the articles will come to mirror those syndicated by CNN. They?ve offered classic pieces in the past, like the one about how ?Boomers know how to use Facebook! ?Boomers boast about their sex lives! ?Boomers bragging about how they?re going to spoil their parents before they die! Those articles are hilarious. Booming, take note: you need to mimic the CNN formula.
One of the recent blog posts on Booming is called ?Boomers vs. Millennials: Who?s Really Getting Robbed?? Naturally, the Boomers are getting robbed, according to the author of the article. There are far too many quotes I could pick apart from this article, but my favorite is this:
When I attended Harvard, tuition, room and board cost my parents about $5,000 a year. My wife and I are paying about $60,000 a year for our daughter to attend. Tell me again about the greedy boomers robbing the millennials.?
Hey, you, whoever authored this shit. You are a fucking moron. Maybe if you didn?t elect Ronald Reagan twice and allow him to build an economy in which a tiny portion of the population got all the gold, selfishly cut taxes for those who made more money, and pass on the bill (the deficit) to the next generation, this wouldn?t have happened. Considering all that shit you preached in the ?60s about peace and harmony and idealism it was kind of fucked up to turn your back on that once you newly-minted conservatives entered the workforce and learned the power of the almighty dollar. Lucky for you, the road rose up to meet you after you (or your parents) had paid that paltry $5,000 college tuition. You didn?t leave college in debt $25,000 like the average college graduate does today. And, hey, if you didn?t go to college in the ?60s or ?70s you could go to work in any number of industries, at any number of factories, family businesses, et cetera. But it?s been your generation that has turned Reagan?s $3-trillion dollar debt into a $16-trillion dollar debt. It was your generation that started outsourcing jobs to foreign companies, eliminating millions of potential jobs for those children you?re so selflessly paying $60,000 out of your heard-earned coiffeurs to educate. Want to whine a little more about how expensive college tuition is these days? YOU SHOULDN?T HAVE HAD CHILDREN, ASSHOLES. What?d you think, your little vanity projects would grown up in some utopian world where education was free and everyone was on equal footing and they could enjoy all the wonderful economic bounties that just happened to be there waiting for you when YOU came of age? Fuck off. You killed that dream yourself when you moved from burning draft cards during the Vietnam War to using your education in the ?80s to lay off those who had to fight in the war only to return without the education that you snapped up while they were gone. 40 years ago you loved to talk about equality and sharing the wealth. But now that your kid is 17, it?s a real bitch to have to support the child YOU brought into this world. $60,000 too much for you? Drive a Chevy instead of an Audi. If you can?t resist the urge to spoil yourself, at least invest in your child?s future and your retirements equally. I know, it?s a drag, but have some common sense. Even the most selfish, spoiled, sense-of-entitlement-feeling ?Boomer should know that each child you have takes away from your precious nest egg that much more. It?s not the Millenials robbing ?Boomers here, it?s you taking from your own pockets and trying to pass off your greed and arrogance onto your kids. Again, if I haven?t been abundantly clear: fuck you.
Lothar And The Hand People ? Heatwave [MP3]
Source: http://www.swanfungus.com/2012/09/baby-boomers-think-were-robbing-from-them.html
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